See Both Points of View

To get along with other people, it is essential to be able to see things from their point of view -- even if you disagree with them.

Realize that no two people view things exactly the same way. For example, Rabbi Yisrael Salanter said that taking away a broken box from a child is equivalent to sinking the boat of an adult.

Being aware of how someone else perceives a matter will decrease the chances of a quarrel -- even though you might disagree.

pk

This is a good one. I constantly worry that technology is moving so fast that by the time I can work again, my field will have advanced so far ahead of where I am, that my services will be obsolete.

I agree rudywoofs. Its been 2 years+ now that I've been out of work. And when I apply for work in my field, and see what they want, I know that I'm going to have to catch up.

pk

Gratitude For When Things Do Work Well

Thing don't always work as we would want them to. Machines break down. People don't remember to do what they said they would. Stores run out of things, and sometimes they are closed when they were scheduled to be open. Letters we were supposed to receive aren't always delivered on time. Messages are not always given to us. The amount of things that don't work out the way they usually do is enormous.

How will your emotional reaction be towards these types of occurrences? It's up to you.

Some people choose to be frustrated and disappointed. They feel stress and distress. They lack a feeling of well-being.

A master of gratitude will use all occurrences to gain greater mastery over gratitude. Each time something doesn't work out the way they would want it to, they remember to feel grateful for all the times that things do work out well. This pattern of thinking gives them feelings of happiness and joy.

When a machine breaks down, they are happy for all the times when this and other machines do work. If someone doesn't remember to do what he said he would, they are grateful for all the times this person did remember. And they are grateful for other people remembering to do what they said they would. When stores run out of things, it's a reminder to be grateful for all the times this store and other stores had the things that you needed and wanted. A message not given is a reminder to be more careful to give over messages yourself, and to be grateful for all the messages that you did receive. A letter not received on time is a reminder to be grateful for all the letters you did receive on time. All the many things that don't work out the way they usually do, are reminders to be grateful for all multitude of things that do work out.

A person who integrates this pattern will live a life of gratitude and happiness.

pk

PKRAUSE

yes we need to always be thankful for the
positive things in our lifes

dgrimm60

Adopt a Softer View

We can view the manner in which people treat us in many different ways. Why choose a negative approach, when you can choose a positive one?

For example, if your parents treat you in a manner you consider suitable for someone younger than you, you might be inclined tell yourself "It's awful how they treat me like a baby." But you can also view this as a manifestation of your parents' love and concern for you.

pk

PKRAUSE

THIS is a good thought and advice

dgrimm60

All For The Good

The Shulchan Aruch (Code of Jewish Law) states: "A person should acquire the habit of constantly repeating [Rabbi Akiva's Talmudic statement]: 'Whatever the Almighty does is for the good.'" (Orach Chaim 230:5)

Imagine a day in which everything went well. Every conversation and transaction with others went exactly as you would have wished. All the hundreds of daily tasks and routines you engaged in worked out to your complete satisfaction. How would you feel? Extremely happy! (Unless of course you ruin it for yourself by worrying that perhaps in the future things might go wrong!) You'd probably be in such a good mood by the end of the day that trivial irritants would not bother you in the least.

Living with a Torah perspective means that every event that happens to us throughout the day is for our ultimate good. If we would internalize this concept, our standard mood would be joy!

pk

PKRAUSE

THIS is very good advice

dgrimm60

We Never had it so Good

Every person alive today derives great benefit from comforts and pleasures that were not available in the past. All of the latest technological advances serve us to a remarkable degree. For all this we should be full of appreciation and gratitude.

Today, take a few minutes and make a list of things available for your use today that did not exist a few hundred years ago (or even 20 years ago!). Notice how these things help you and make life easier and more comfortable.

pk